Get ready to cry, Kim Taehyung is here
Below you'll find a Speed Recap (i.e. the full episode in ten bulletpoints or less) and then some hot takes on the highlights. As always, spoilers ahead and if you're confused as to who's who, check out the...Who's Who post.
Speed recap: Hwarang, Episode 2
At the closing of Episode 1, DogBird was about to kick the shit out of Ban-ryu's bitchy friend after Mak-Moon turned up at Silla's hottest nightclub and tried to sneak into the VIP area. DogBird makes his point and we all get out of the club in one piece.
BUT NOT FOR LONG. Mak-Moon doesn't even make it through episode two, as Executive Murder finds him and DogBird, recognises Mak-Moon as the guy who may have seen the King's face (Silla seemingly being a Very Small Place) and cuts them both down unceremoniously. Before passing out, DogBird catches a glimpse of the King himself (who arrives too late to call off the attack), but only his bracelet - and assumes this to be Mak-Moon's murderer. This show is already 60% about jewelry.
Meanwhile, the King wants Ah-ro to read him stories to get him to sleep, because no-one has invented ASMR yet. Broke, she agrees but accidentally sleeps over and freaks out about it.
Having heard there was a lad with the necklace wandering around Da Club, Master Ahnji (Ah-ro and Mak-Moon's father) goes a-searching, arriving just in time to see his son die in (very) prolonged agony.
DogBird wakes up in the home of Master Ahnji, and make-up noona has really gone to town on making his lips look 'deathy'. He vows revenge for Mak-Moon's death.
Back at the palace, the Queen and Wi-hwa set about recruiting 'men as beautiful as flowers" and the boys' dads aren't exactly thrilled about it. They demand the Queen seek the King's approval, in a move any woman in a management position will immediately find #relatable.
We manage to get Ah-ro involved in this plotline by having her inexplicably sign-up to spy on the potential Hwarangs on Wi-hwa's behalf. Unbeknownst to her, she's being tailed herself by the King's Executive Assistant.
In our final scene, we end up with Ah-ro being tailed by the King, being tailed himself by DogBird (who's clocked his bracelet). Swords get drawn then TIME FOR BOPPY CREDITS.
What did we learn?
HE'S HERE!
If like me, you started watching this show because your BTS bias is the weird one, then you're finally in luck: Kim Taehyung shows up in the second half of the episode. His busy schedule has clearly meant that there was no time for a wig-fitting, but LOOK HOW CUTE.
DogBird's mysterious neurological trauma
DogBird appears to go through some kind of neurological trauma a propos of nothing just as Executive Murder shows up. Is he dying? Is he a werewolf? Is he some kind of visionary? Time will tell (except this is Hwarang, so it probably won't).
Mak-Moon, fare thee well
This beautiful friendship meets its end with Mak-Moon spewing an unnecessary amount of blood all over Dog-Bird's throat. Called it.
Story within a story
Ah-ro is starting to spin a yarn on two heroes based on her encounters with weirdo king and Dog-Bird. She's probably never going to finish it, but let's pretend.
Okta looks even more ridiculous in the daytime
You what.
The King really can't talk to girls
When you like someone, there are better ways of getting her attention then having your bodyman follow her all over town. Further proof, if any were needed, that single-sex education for boys is a terrible idea.
I'm starting to find all this hair sexy now
What?
